Skip to main content

Mo' money, Same problems....

One of the reasons I LOVE Cardi B is because she is as she describes a 'regular regular' girl.

via GIPHY

But with that comes 'regular' problems.... girl drama (Nickii), 'haters' and issues with husbands/partners.

via GIPHY

Now don't get me wrong, I was totally #teamBarSet until I watched him exhibit the same disturbing  behaviors that I (and a ton of other women) was healing from myself.



The shit is mad toxic.
I was recently at a party and explained WHY the #barSet drama was so triggering  to women (or people in general) and why people cared, simply as this ; 

While celebs are regular people are the end of the day, we often watch their lives on social media as a release from our own. I mean seriously wouldn't you rather escape your paper pushing to ride on private jets and shopping? 

Right, I digress

Secondly, most women have been in Cardi's position, just not with such expensive make up gestures or embarrassment on an international level.... So watching a woman who spent the past almost two years winning, and having the fairytale we all wanted on some level get shitted on is like reopening a wound.. It can be simply off-putting for those of us working hard to 'have it all'. 

And then there is Offset....
While I applaud the public efforts to get his wife and family back, I (like most ) am not impressed by any of his fuck boy deluxe antics..... And find it all to be super selfish honestly....
Between the public posts causing more drama and attention while this woman is working while grieving the loss of her relationship, the fact that he needed to disrupt her while she was at work by coming on stage during one of the biggest performances of her career (stealing her moment as FIRST WOMAN to headline Rolling Loud) and lastly all of this drama MONTHS after she had his baby while she could very well be battling postpartum depression (yall forget women of color get that too) shows a blatant lack of regard for her, her health and her career.

I mean seriously, he called her 'bruh' in his PUBLIC APOLOGY 

I know I may sound like I am dragging this, but ask yourself this, would his public apology while she was at work would be as cute, if Cardi B was in a boardroom? courtroom? call center? 
No, it wouldn't.
Offset is a brutal reminder that no matter how much money or how well a woman does for herself, she can still be subjected to undeserved bullshit at the hands of someone who 'loves' her. For a week this man has been putting on this show for all of the world but has yet to acknowledge the root of the problem; the cheating, and lying. Offset has been making solo decisions while in a whole partnership, leaving Cardi to be the one to 'save face' and be graceful while the world is watching her be done so wrong..... 

I have dated Offset (well not literally but stay with me)....
I was romantically involved on an emotional rollercoaster with someone who cheated, embarrassed me, and lied to me.....My 'Offset' gave me the same make up gestures, just at a lower price point; the flowers, gifts ,and social media post, but none of which ended up meaning much, because the moment I lowered my guard, I was slapped with more of those same behaviors that lead us down our path of destruction.  I am at the point of my healing that I don't completely blame  my 'Offset' for where we are at this point in life, I know that I could have made better choices in our situation, like not listening to friends and family when I was told I should stay (something Cardi is obviously being given since it was her PR that walked him out last night). While her circumstances are slightly different, I was not married nor did i have a child with my 'Offset', so Cardi will have to have an actual exit strategy , when I could have just left during the first situation. 
I have been Cardi before, taking up for someone who had no issue doing me wrong because I assumed we shared a mutual love for each other, all while subconsciously ruining my self esteem trying to figure out what made this person do me wrong, doing more, giving more of myself because I thought that could fix things between us when in all actuality, this person didn't love me enough to 'fix' us (or maybe even themselves on some level).

While I completely side with Cardi because I been her, I still want Offset to do better because he has a little girl who make decisions on love based on how she sees her mother being treated .

Do it for the Kulture.





Comments

  1. Well said!!!! Do better Offset...and that’s w/o the audience.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Omg that apology was the worse thing ever. He then was really horrible by coming on stage at rolling loud . Very toxic and trash .

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Fashion cues for the Attractive and Mature....

For some reason everyone wants to claim to be 'grown and sexy'.....And for some reason cant dress the part... So Ive created my own phrase "this isnt for the grown and sexy,this is for the mature and attractive"....On the strength that those of us who actually are 'grown and sex' do not have to remind those around us EVERY 5 MINS or attend events named after this fad saying.....Attractive and mature have the form of dress that states it. So take these few helpful hints.... 1-Ladies;your jewelry needs to be simple and functional.A few simple pieces (not made of PLASTIC or from the hair store) say alot ....Perfect examples are.... a cocktail ring a silver 'return to Tiffany&co' bracelet or just something lite to put around your wrist a pearl necklace;classic AND sexy. a plain gold hoops <==NO,i repeat NO doorknockers a pearl earrings 2-Step your shoe game up,purchase a good CLASS pair of shoes What is a good pair of shoes you ask?A good pair of

The Normal Ones...

So of course every good blogger has these super glam photos posted on their blogs and IG. Like they look like they literally "woke up like this".... So if you know me, the glam thing you know that is a super stretch.. I'm normal at this point in life, I prefer leggings, Jordans and hoodie every chance I get... I have served my time in the club in 5-6 inch heels with the dresses short enough for my niece to wear. So when I sat down with my good friend, Chaz about doing photos for my blog I know I was probably every photographers nightmare. No, like seriously.... She asked about my ideas for my shoot, my visions, and I had nothing.. I mean I'm not a model? I like cookies too much....My 'sexy face' looks like I have something in my eye,lol So I did my own make up (scary, I know), Wore two of my favorite items; a denim shirt from Torrid (that my boobs are apparently too big for), and a tulle skirt from Zellie For She, And sat in front of the ca

Size and the standard of beauty ;The little girl in the pink jumper

So lately I've been battling with some deamons as far as my appearance..... As a bigger girl I have learned what can make or break you in terms of beauty..... Yet I still find it shocking when people find me attractive.I'm very shy,and often it hard to believe that people find me beautiful......I always resort back to moments of my childhood.... Picture this..... A chubby bubbly lite skin girl with braids and barettes in a pink and white shirt,deniem jumper,white socks,and pink/white nikes(eh I was a 90's kid) comes to her desk and sees a note.... "Dear Ashlei Will you be my girlfriend?" The little girl looks over to the most popular boy in class,who happens to be smiling at her from ear to ear.The youg girl sends a note back,"Yes"backwards "s" and all....Later on that day as the children file out of their lines for recess,the girls on one side stepping,playing house,and the boys on the other wresling,playing football,etc.....A yung ma