Skip to main content

Last night....

Last night I was ridding home after the Beyonce and Bruno Mars concert (the Super Bowl) with a close friend of mine discussing friendship and falling out with good friends......

My friend had a falling out with a good friend some time ago, and had received a message in attempt to maybe reconcile their friendship......My friend said 'Cookii, what do you think? '


I stopped and plainly said 'Why are we so willing to forgive the same tired ass romantic interest,but when we fall out with a GOOD friend, we act as if they are so disposable ?'


This really seems to be a common practice, especially with women.... We have what is normally a small or not so small disagreement over something that is probably not worth throwing away the years of good friendship. 


I can't lie, I've done this and still currently learning to handle it honestly.

So instead of confronting your friend to hash all the dumb stuff out, we take to social networking to make a string of sub tweets/status/posts or talking to a mutual party about the situation often spilling every annoying/stupid/shady/phony thing your 'friend' has done in the course of the friendship (that you never commented on and bottled up). 


However,

As all of this is going on, you are still forgiving the same tired ass romantic partner for doing all the cheating,lying,etc they do. 



Why?

Why are we so quick to sever ties with someone we have shared the best and worst moments of our lives so quickly, yet we will knowing lay next to someone we have to battle to tell the truth.......



Why do we value romance more than friendship?

Especially when we know we need a friend after we end our toxic romantic relationship that was doomed anyways, I mean who else but that friend is going to run to our rescue at 2 am with a bottle of wine and tell us 'He (or she for that matter) ain't shit anyways...'

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The tale of two identities.

As children, most of us are raised to go to college, get good jobs and strive for greatness. As black children, most of us are raised to go to college, be better than 'them' so you can't be denied, strive for greatness and act accordingly in spaces that are not our own. As a lot of us grow up, we take heed to our lessons, aiming for success, entering spaces (and tax brackets) that weren't able to be accessed by our grandparents and sometimes our own parents, but struggle because we aren't taught the rules of 'the game' nor do we start out from a equal space than our colleagues.  Imagine taking your 5 year old child, telling them they have learn all the 1st grade through 6th grade material at once in a room full of 11 year olds who are already dealing with advance placement work... So we are forced to learn on our own and quickly, how to 'act' ,where to be authentic ourselves, which hairstyles to wear ,what to wear to off hours company events,

I kinda did a thing......Nothing major...

  Class of 2020 Photo credit Natasha Herbert

Chapter 7....

 Wow.... Thanks for tuning back in, I know I kinda left you hanging after Chapter 6, and it totally wasn't intentional....  But processing the last few months of personal health battles, international pandemics, lack of therapy and some other things, reliving certain parts of 2020 are a struggle. However, we are back! ....My surgeon laughed, 'wow, Silvia?' 'Yea, Silvia... Thats her name', I went on to explain how after my weight loss surgery I named my stomach Shelia. In the process of these procedures, naming things has given me a sense of ownership and control over things I truly don't have any over. My coworkers and manager all address Shelia by name too  I signed what seemed like my life away on a stack of papers and tried to ask all the last minute questions I could? But honestly what could I ask.... Silvia and the excess skin were going....period. She gave me a list of instructions for pre and post instructions, the hospital wash (its soo gross),day of ins