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Showing posts from March, 2015

Confessions of a fluffkini

So of course swimsuit season is approaching super fast....
A rare photo of me in a swimsuit (Miami 2013)
Am I ready?
Of course not.... I mean yea,I have like suits waiting from a few years ago, one with tags still on it from Torrid (that can be purchased here) ,and another Torrid one that I am not sure if I will keep?

But yea, I am not prepared...Well not mentally at least.... This trend is based on more than just fun prints and colors... It's about body confidence and no longer hiding pieces and parts that are often frowned upon.... Am I ready to join the group of bold women who aren't hiding their stretch marks,bellys and curves behind bulky t-shirts and ugly skirted print suits??

For the past few seasons the plus size girls have been killing two piece suits from Monif C ,Gabri Fresh For Swimsuits For All , Torrid ,and Forever 21+ . I was super on edge about even thinking of wearing one of these....


So I got some courage, grabbed a friend, and carried myself to my local Torrid to t…

Cleveland's Own Vain Virgin Hair

So everyone knows I am a loyal Lace Xclusive shopper, I mean a real #xclusiveBarbie,a 18-30' kinda chic and I struggle with change........
 But  I recently reconnected with a former classmate,Ashley who retails her own hair, and I figured I would try something new but true to me. She not only retails her product but also wears it,so I have seen it in various stages,and always thought it was beautiful. .

I ordered the Malaysian curly 24,26,28,30 from Vain Virgin Hair in a natural hair color, I will be dying my hair back dark to match, I have had enough fun as a blonde,lol... But seriously, I really took this chance for the same reasons I tried, LX years ago, because this is a black female owned business,.

The bundles came super fast,I ordered on Friday and received my order the following Tuesday. They are dark, thick, and full ...... The last beautiful touch was my free gift with purchase, a pack of lashes! I love the Ardell shorts,because the longs make me look like a bit like a drag…

18 vs 28.

You ever think of things you wish you could tell your younger self? 
You know to just avoid the loss of money,heartbreak,etc.... Not that I regret any of the decisions that I have made really,just kind of wish I may have done one or two things differently....
If I could see younger Ash, I would tell her....
Always follow your heart,while it may not lead you to your destiny,it won't lead you to your regret.. You will never be paid what you are worth,if you are...you are low balling yourself.... I have underestimated myself in the past, not realizing that its okay to be Kanye about the situation Stop building a wall around your heart, try a fence so it can still be seen...... I have always been quite selective about who I let in,sometimes to the point of letting the world outThe friends you make from age 16 to about age 24 will more than likely be some of the friends you will keep forever. ....... From Kelli to the 408 girls to Ayanna, my core group has been there for me and vice versa…
One of the things every woman should have is a way out.... 
Shop my closet now on Poshmark! Not yet a member? Get a $5 credit when you join with code: HJNCW. 

Shop my closet on Poshmark! http://bit.ly/1raWrS6 

Tuesday inspiration...

Am I traitor ??

I've received a lot of mixed responses  on my post about gastric bypass last week, some expected, some supportive, and one thought provoking.....

I was talking with young woman that I know,and after she read my blog, she told me..
 'Being fat sucks, we both know. People are so damn shallow'
That's the thing, I never felt the real effects of being 'the fat girl in high school', I was extremely active...I played sports, did show choir, acapella choir, and was the only plus size girl in the senior fashion show..... As an adult, I didn't suffer either? I've dated more than alot of my smaller friends, done small time modeling work, still remained active, traveled and currently living a great life, just with lots of late night eating and of course 2-3 cocktails (lol).
Then she hit me with idea that I never thought about... 'This is what I don't understand about the plus size movement and why I cant get down with it. At the end of the way, a lot of people w…

Although I'm so #teamMuvaRoseBud

Everyone is downing Kanye,but I think we need more outspoken black men who are daring enough to speak up,be articulate and love themselves.
 The man said he was a God,and why shouldn't he feel this way about himself,because others are offended by his greatness? 
 Maybe he isn't the problem,maybe folks on the sideline who constantly condemn him for loving himself are the problems ? 

But Dorinda raised a young king who acknowledges he is a king.... Isn't that the goal?

Do i miss 'College Dropout' Kanye ?
Yes,but he has he evolved ...As a man and artist, and while I may not agree with alot of that ,you have to admit evolution is a sign of progress

You can choose to hate it but this man is doing what most can't...
Not make millions of dollars,perform in front of millions or sleep with Kim K.

He is doing and saying what he wants,unapologetic-ally ...

Be honest with yourself,when is the last time you did that??



Remember last July...

Last July I wrote an open letter to an amazing person I hadn't even met yet,my niece Jaisen....
Well about a month later,she was waiting for me the day I moved back to Cleveland... 
Allow me to introduce my ladybug....


#np Only one - Kanye West

A fluffy girl who may not be a fluffy woman anymore....

I've written many blogs about being plus size, the battle of my weight ,going to the gym,etc....
And honestly I love me,so what I am getting ready to say is super weird...
I have been considering the possibility of gastric bypass? No, no one has made me feel bad about me No, I don't hate myself  No, I'm not being pressured by anyone I'm dating No, I'm not considering it to get anyone to date me.

....Its a mental battle that I think almost every plus size woman has? What would life be like, if I was smaller? 
I have toyed with the idea for the past three years... And often put it out of my mind because people in my circle talked me out of it, or assure me that I was attractive the way I was and often condone my out of control eating, and late night drinking. Then I thought about it, me not getting it because I'm being told that I am attractive, is almost as bad as me getting it because I am told I am not. This is something that has to be done for me,IF I choose to do it? A…

Cookii does Las Vegas

One of my 30 things I want to do before 30 was to visit Las Vegas....
As you can see,I did.... And I loved every minute of it!!! At some point I thought it was okay to get in a box?

Heff likes his girls BBW..

Me and PeeWee
The most beautiful part of this was... No snow!!
I didn't win a thing!
Alan swerved me...


Pour it up,Pour it up!!

Confessions of a fluffy girl going to work....

So due to my new job, I've needed to invest in brand new fashions....

Which is crazy when my prior ideas of career clothing were colorful maxis or Jordans and Nike tees.

.....Oh crap, I've become an adult.
My struggle to 'look the part' ,stay warm,be in the correct color (all black) and be true to myself is a constant battle...Seems stressful for no reason,right? Well it kinda is,I refuse to wear pants, prefer dresses or knit skirts,and want something I can throw a light cardigan over as the weather changes. While my job isn't typical 9-5 business wear, and I do have creative freedom, but I would still like to be some what professional?
Did I mention that my dresses have to be a certain length and I am 5'9 1/2?
Yea, the struggle is real?
So with the new season eventually approaching ,I'm researching new possible looks that I can use in my off time as well.....

H&M has become one of my safe places for work wear. Its affordable, cute, and most importantly black!…

I'm blonde again!!!

Let's see if they do have all the fun...