Confessions of a Fluffy Girl Trapped in the Midwest

1-Chris Browns Bowtie

2-For Kim from the housewives to get a HUMAN hair wig.....and some REAL singing lessons

3-For Jodeci to go to rehab and cut a new album!

4-For someone to invent a relaxer that doesnt burn

5-For people to stop wearing ed hardy already

6-Kanye's bottle of henny

7-Faith in the human race

8-For the real death of the autotune

9-For people to stop wearing $400 jeans in a recession

10-For black men to be MEN

To you.......
Im here but not ready.....
In a few years I will have a career,and good credit.....
I can interact with those both human and animal....
Im taking good care of my body so one day I can give you the children we both want....
The mental health doctors say I will be okay if I stay on my path...
Im 5'9,so we could have future basketball players....
I keep my hair done,nails clean,and teeth white...
I know the rules of both the mosque and the church....
I can cook,bake,walk a runway,and make a bed....
I am a dreamer,a smiler,ambious,spoiled,and sometimes a complete bitch,but I am honest...
I have a descent job,but Im always willing to do more to give you the little things,
When I need attention I will nag,but I wont seek it anywhere else.....
I know that you are waiting for me....
So I sit here until I am completely ready for you....
I dont know who you are,
I dont know where you are,
But I hope you are waiting for me because Im waiting for you...

1-Come out the closet, they are still tryin to deal with Unkle Ricky being Aunt Renee` from last christmas

2-Be on the phone,your minutes arent free any damn way !

3-Talk about cousin Demonte being in jail,Peaches being pregnant(even if she is only 12),

4-Please PLEASE do not let grandma get drunk and start telling the churches business....that is not tea or juice in her cup!

5-Dont let Uncle Tyrone and Auntie Pebbles fight at the table about who took the wrong turn to get to dinner....No one wants to hear that shit,we heard it all last year.......and the year before that.....

6-FART,please dont do that shit,it is quite nasty and unpleasant to us all...

7-Dont let Big mama pull her teeth out at the table,that shit is mad disturbing and blows us all

8-Unbutton your pants and belt at the table,no one wants to see that gut,the stretch marks,and the scar from your c-section!

9-Talk about Aunt Helens nasty cornbread stuffing....that no one eats...We know its nasty and it taste like she save…

In a world where plus size models are size 10s and 12s,Ms Velvet D'Amor is such a breath of fresh air....

She has broken size barriers in the modeling industry showing that FAT IS(and not 'can be') BEAUTIFUL by appearing in runway shows for Galliano and Gaultier.She has been condemed for her size with critics saying that she is the role model for a 'unhealthy lifestyler',when she is quite the contrary.



The fashion industry shuns women over a size 2,and for plus size over 12,Velvet is a 5'8,265llbs and size 28...She embraces every pound of it!Everything about this woman is amazing,and even in her early 40s she is still slaying the modeling world.Velvet is internationally known,paving the way for Toccara and other more realistic size women.



Who says fat chics cant be super models?



When asked 'Do you think you are encouraging other to adopt a fat lifestyle?'
'I find the notion utterly laughable. Having read one forum which stated, by Jean Paul (Gauthier) us…

I soo appreciate a well dressed man.
Oh
Em
Gee!

Nothing is a bigger turn off than long ass dingy white tees,pants 3sizes too big,and a hanging 'do rag'..
Yea,I said it!Men have to invest in their clothing,a woman can wear a $44 dollar evening gown and look stunning,but you will know if a man has a $50 suit on.The fit is wrong,the material is cheap,it just looks all bad....

Luckily hip hop stars are starting to double as fashionistas.....Call him crazy but Andre 3000 was wearing cardigans and sweater vest way before Kanye and Wanye!


10-I LOVE guys with nice watches....How could you not?A nice watch shows class and that he is going places....on time!Im a fan of some type of metal band.Leather and plastic just dont do it for me.Dont get me wrong,I do dig a nice g-shock but only for SUPER casual wear,and it has to be worn correctly.
Nixon;Karmaloop.com $120



9-Im a sucker for a guy who has a shoe game to match mine!Im really into contemporary loafer and driver styles.They arent exactly wint…

(This isnt all of them..but arent my kids cute?)
'I gotta probblem....I like to dunk'
-Cookii

Okay-
So Im from Cleveland......Big deal right?
After almost 23 horrible winters,its become one of my favorite season just because of the fun things I can do with fashion!Layers,hats,scarves,mittens,etc....

So will great pride I bring you 'Cookiis winter MUST HAVES for fluffy girls'a complete list of all the things that will get you through the next four months.....


10-Okay so they are SUPER regular but UGG has a strong following and made themselves the basis of any good winter outfit(provided you do not live in a city that has more than an inch of snow)....
Ugg;Nordstrom $180



9- An awsome pair of mittens is always a great way to keep warm AND cute!I prefer the ones that fold back so I can use my keys...or hold a frappachino!
Juicy Couture; Saks 5th Ave $65



8-Call me super boring but I LOVE a black pea coat,I think its classic and perfect way to have fun with hats and mittens!
Torrid;Torrid.com $128
*I personally upgraded from the OLD NAVY Wool pea coat to a GUESS pea coat this year,the…